2024 Recommendations & end of the year
follow ups
Hi there :)
This mixed media art piece (pictured above) started in an experimental poetry workshop I was facilitating later this year. There was a shared prompt about using materials to create poems within a minute, and a participant wrote, “Anticipation leads to celebration.” I created this mixed media collage-cocoon that envisions minority womenx’s ideas assimilated in the process of ‘becoming.’ The orange in the upper section represents the torn, desiccated sky, and the blue below is the water, the underbelly. It is layered, as layered as life is. Living as a minority in Iowa, this piece conceptualizes anti-art used to signify existence in vibrancy through observation and less-ness.
This is a safe and nurturing corner for me; thank you for staying put through all my crazy thoughts, selfies, and ideas. This is my fifth year writing letters- I can speak my mind (the way I have been taught to live) without expectations (the way I am learning to live). This space has, in a way, given me ‘time’ to reflect on with other souls who read my letter. What a comfort in this vast universe to know that even though I sit in a cornfield and type, I am not alone. The cornfield almost becomes this letter… I am not without a community that ‘listens’ and ‘supports.’Yet, I am ready not to tether myself to any ‘one singular’ feeling. At the age of 31, I have become a minimalist, a conserver, and a treasurer of ‘infact’ moments in time. To have less, to think less, and to know less. So, to thank you further, I share some year-end favorite tips and tricks!
These days, I follow the rule of 3: Swim Sauna and Steam
Going for a hot sauna and steam, followed by a relaxing bath at home, does wonders, and I follow this routine thrice a week! I have finally learned to swim, and for those who are new here, I am a novice swimmer now—I could hardly swim to save my life, and I am proud to say that I can do backflips, butterfly swim, and float without worries for hours on stretch. Without feeling like gravity does not like me. Without feeling like holding onto my mother's hand when she made sure I did not float away during Chatt puja at 6 am in the chilly polluted waters of the Sabarmati River, Ahmedabad.
Freezing in the cold as that memory is, I have the luxury of having access to a heated swimming pool and a sauna that has added a living perk to melting my stresses.
Post 30- foot spa machine at home for Christmas is the kind of gift I look forward to, and I am using it twice every day now. LOL 2025, here I come, no achy feet, I hope! All the advantages of a foot spa can be obtained within your home, and I usually unwind with essential oils, face masks, and music in readiness for bed when my feet are sore and tired. If you suffer from plantar fasciitis like me (mine was pretty severe when I came to the US), I highly recommend getting yourself a foot spa massager/heater. I recently heard of light therapy, which I am excited to try. Following a disastrous chiropractic appointment sans any adjustments that cost me $140, I made the decision to devote more time to research and conversation instead of impulsively scheduling sessions. I am happy to report that my back feels better, and my soreness is gone after I found ‘the one.’ It has taken multiple visits and ‘adjustments’ which I think one needs to have life-long once you get accustomed, so be mindful of that. If you have a similar healing experience, do share.
It took me a month to feel ‘normal,’ and I am going to continue the 3S’s and, in this upcoming new year, invest more in fitness and wellness. There, I have the ‘highly demanded’ resolution to look forward to.
Back in India, I used to live on samples, compete for brand deals, and purchase items in a haul I might not come across again. My life as a reviewer, a so-called search for free products and validation, came at a price—skin and sin suffered. Now, even if it occasionally costs a kidney, buying what I want is the best part of adulting. Sometimes, in defiance, I purchase an expensive diffuser or body oil; but, I usually thank my impulsiveness when I am depressed or under stress! :) DIY foot soaks are ideal When your body aches on cold days, starting from feet up. Sometimes using leftover milk or crushing sage and thyme in running bath after an energetic swim can do wonders for sore muscles!
3S prompts to start your new year with:
Swam, drowned—two things that you would list in your life skills that have made a difference
Plunge in a liminal swimming pool and into a liminal sauna- what do you feel/free?
Fulminated/Roiled/Sweat bullets/rooms in which you and I become water/hot springs/Kjeldahl distillation/penetration/fogged your way
In another ‘How have your 30s changed?’ I have decreased my screen time drastically and have been excelling at ‘grounding practices.’ I have increased my meditative hours to an hour now from half an hour. I deleted apps before people left X. Lol Recognized dead trends before they were dead. It takes a lot to sit in silence with nothingness. The past year has been full of recognizing trauma, building regrowth, and asking for rebirth for me. Earlier this month, a dear poem of mine that reflects the reality of the place I belong to, the beauty and the harrowness, was published after many rejections by The Coachella Review. Are We Broken Are We Dreaming of a Gulf a Bay? Are We Wanting To was conceived long ago (as long as 1993, in the belly of my maa) but only formalized in sequence in one regulating stanza after a decade.
Sometimes, art takes time, and time takes time to give us time to become what we wish our art was before us.
But time is, in the end, the answer to everything. If 2024 has taught me anything, it is how powerful time is. How mysterious…..
If there is any ‘one’ particular thing that you would like to navigate as you end this year, make it DIAGRAM’s latest issue here. I invite you to explore DIAGRAM's unique text-image technical documentation, which offers an array of schematics that will captivate your senses and leave you in awe. Just a world waiting to be seen, unraveled.
Instead of making a list or giving bullets, I decided to write prose-style rec for this year-end letter. I am trying something old-school, something I have never done. After by Vivek Narayanan and Splinters by Leslie Jamison are two of my top reads of this year. Not that these books were released this year, but I read them when I needed them the most, and that is why they belong on my list. Ghost Fishing: an eco-justice poetry anthology by Melissa Tuckey is an excellent anthology that blew my creative brain away. I am holding onto this one. Other influences: an untold history of feminist avant-garde poetry by Durand, Marcella was an out-of-the-world surreal find—one that goes down in the history of how I entered by the 30’s. I have enjoyed reading ‘Best of’ and ‘Nominations’ while also editing and nominating literature from writers around the world, so to say that I had suggest reading The Best Writing on Mathematics 2021 by Mircea Pitici would be an understatement, as everyone who wants to see how language effects the experience of a reader through science would not only find so but more. The Coin by Yasmin Zaher is another significant experience that I unraveled as the world mourns the deaths of innocence and human rights. Recombinant by Ching-In Chen was one of my favorite experimental texts of 2024 that influenced how I thought of my work. The Thief Who Stole My Heart by Vidya Dehejia and The Aesthetics of Taste: Eating within the Realm of Art by Dorota Koczanowicz helped me regain the shape of my research with respect to another multi-media project that I am undertaking. There is also a list of books that I can’t wait to read releases by favs Caroliena Cabada and Debra Marquart.
From the box office at home binge: I re-watched Don’t Worry, Darling again just yesterday (I am on a binge run where I just completed Squid Game 2, Undercover TV show), and I am always in awe of everything about the movie, particularly the mind-blowing array of soundtracks. Some more recs: Fairplay, Alone TV series, Conclave, Survivor TV series (a mix of old and new to keep you cozy at home if you like me are done partying the f out till 4 AM on 31st Dec)
Instead of watching classics, I delved into the new world of unending recommendations by browsing YouTube recs.
During Christmas, as a child, I used to be excited about Santa Claus, pecan pies, and plum cakes from my neighbors, and choir singing at the school church. I used to be extremely excited about gifting. I loved Diwali and New Year for the same reason—gifts & gratitude for everything/everyone
I decided to compile a small catalog of the gifts I brought for me, my friends, and my family. These are the little things, the big things, and the expensive and charming boutique-giving vibes that might be indulgent for some; some might find it quickly interesting to possess. I, for one, love the idea of handcrafted note-sent gifts that are personalized, perishable, and exquisite. I gifted my love, Brightland Pizza Oil! I am sure our many pizza pajama parties will light up the many evenings to come in 2025! Last week, I spent over $400 on goodies, gifts, and collectible skincare! I am only flushing the bucks in your face for you to understand the ‘giving’ it takes to ‘getting’ the look, the feels, and the flaunt. I recently discovered Sol De Janiero, got myself the gift set, and I can’t wait to try the products out, which have been recommended by most of the makeup buffs I know + my new favorite, stripper YouTubers that give honest, tried reviews/recs! I have only recently found out about the iceberg tales on YouTube, which I watch when soaking my feet in bubbles and heated water at 108 degrees with a bath spa gifted to me! I spent $$$ on Lush bootylicious bath products (I am thankful to my friend who introduced me to the amazing brand—I love how they operate and how their store smells; it is impossible not to buy) I also am in love with the biggest beauty find of my thirty-one years, Hanahana beauty (!!!!) The Lavender Vanilla Shea Body Butter is simply the best body butter I've ever used. I am like, woooooowwwwww There is an earthiness to the texture, and the melting effect is magical enough for me to eat less out and buy more of these babies. My skin is thanking me. I have always been a fan of natural-origin ingredient-enriched luxury brand L'Occitane, which I have always been a fan of and splurged a bit there.
Universal Yums is a subscription I gladly enjoyed all of 2024. They send you a curated box of different snacks from all around the world. I love gifting the highest-quality cocoa and beautiful decadent, so I went on to splurge on Dandelion Chocolate (a completely random find that is like, where did my money go? but also a try kind of gift). The idea of what I used to read in magazines is me now—the luxury of gifting and the culture of white elephant gifts; bring it on, I say, my inner spirit, splurge away, and I hope I get to earn enough bread so I may share it on the table I make.1
Meanwhile,weheeee- Some gifting guides for your pleasure to peruse (I bookmark and wishlist things that I want for future gloomy days):
https://nymag.com/strategist/gifts/https://www.wsj.com/buyside/gifts/gift-guides\
https://www.nytimes.com/wirecutter/lists/most-popular-picks-style-beauty-2024/
https://www.vogue.com/100-gifts-that-are-under-100
https://www.gq-magazine.co.uk/gallery/christmas-gifts-for-her
I will note some more recs in the next newsletter and would be happy to hear from you should there be a department of recs you would like me to highlight. Perhaps more TV shows and movies. Perhaps my most beloved locations in Ames/local favorites?
I hope you all have an amazing end and even an amazing beginning to a new year, and I will see you soon!
If you liked what you read and the work I put in this free yet not cheap letter, kindly consider gifting $$ via venmo @belladonnaoflavender (THANK YOU FOR YOUR GENEROSITY) or by simply liking, commenting, and sharing this letter with your community because I am always in search for more like-minded peeps to hold me up <3
Wrote this letter listening to pashto
None of the products mentioned in the newsletter are sponsored. I have spent my hard-earned bucks (peanuts collected over time) and am sharing my personal views out of love and respect for research & time.
as always, thoroughly enjoyed your writing!!